Crab Mentality

Sa magkakapatid, hindi mo maiiwasan ang inggitan. Dahil na rin siguro sa pagpapalaki ng magulang na hindi mo din masisisi kung merong kakampihan sa magkakapatid, hindi naman kasi sila magkaka pareho ng asal at ugali. Kahit na rin siguro sa magkakabarkada o magkaka-opisina ay mayroong inggitan, pero ang hindi ko matanggap tanggap ay iyong sisiraan ka pa para lang makuha ang gusto nila.

Ang tinatawag na pagiging utak talangka ng mga Pilipino ang pinaka ayoko sa lahat ng mga masasamang ugali natin kasunod ng tinatawag na filipino time at mañana habit. ‘Yun bang bakit kailangan mong dumating sa punto na kailangan mong ilaglag yung mga taong wala namang kinalaman sa kasalukuyang estado mo para makuha mo ang gusto mo o kaya para madungisan mo man lang sila para makaganti dahil hindi naging patas ang antas ng mga trabaho ninyo?

Ano ba ang kailangan nating patunayan dito? Na mas madami tayong ginagawa kumpara sa iba? Na dapat ay mas malaki ang nakukuha nating benepisyo kaysa sa mga inaakala mong walang ginagawa?

Sino ba ang nagsabi sa iyo na tanggapin mo kung magkano ang nakukuha mo ngayon? Sila ba?

Sino ba ang nagsabi sa iyo na pumayag ka sa kontrata mo? Sila ba?

Kung magiging ganyan ang usapan e mas malaki pala ang karapatan kong magreklamo, pero bakit ko naman gagawin iyon? Bakit ko kailangang isisi sa iba ang mga kinahinatnan ng mga desisyon na pinasok ko?

‘Yan ang hirap sa atin e, nauuna ang pagtingin natin sa ginagawa ng iba bago ang mga sarili natin. Nauuna lagi ang pagsilip sa kabilang plato at huhusgahan kagad ang kapitbahay dahil ang ulam nila ay manok.

Kaya tayo hindi umaasenso e.

Bangon Pilipino! Dahil kapag hindi ka nagbago, mauubos ang mga taong marunong magsikap sa sarili at hindi kailangang manghila ng paa ng iba. Mauubos sila dahil lahat sila ay titira na sa ibang bansa at walang matitira sa iyo kung hindi ang mga taong walang ginawa kundi mainggit sa sitwasyon ng iba.

Bitter.

-Sheldon

Friend

Fred has and always been my closest friend especially on those times that I was alone. You see, living a life without anyone to talk or converse to for almost a month is unnerving. I’m loud. I’m a conversationalist. I’m a clown. It would be a culture shock for me not to be engaged in any small talks. May it be just goof around talk or a closed-door meeting; I have to be the one speaking. I have to communicate. I must.

So being away from my family and my lady for a month was really sad. I wake up each day with no one to greet a good morning or good evening to. I eat alone and have no one to talk about what happened yesterday and no one to discuss with about my plans for tomorrow. I was almost on the verge of going somewhere; maybe meet a stranger or two, just to know I’m not alone.

But I wasn’t alone all along.

During the times I felt alone, Fred’s there looking at me and asking me to pick him up and play him. I was alive again. I was able to fight off boredom and sadness with him by my side. I even started filming myself with him. The feeling was surreal. I’m so glad I have him. The confidence in me got back whenever he is with me. I wish he will last ‘til I’m old enough and can still carry a guitar.

Yes a folk, Fred’s a guitar.

Meet “Fred,” my new found friend. I called it as such because it was given as a gift by my good friend, Alfred Sajot III – thus the name. I also find the name cute, so the name stuck.

At least once in our lives, we will feel alone in this world. That even though we see a lot of people, it will still feel like you’re on your own. One needs a friend to be relevant again. Fred made the musician-wannabe in me, alive again.

Fred, I love you ‘tol, together with James the Bike, my good old friends.

Here’s the song we made together called “Sayo.”

-Raj

The Struggle for Power

Being a politician is a full-time job. There's no 'clock-out',no 'overtime pay' and definitely no 'rest days' And yet, you can see a lot of them are fighting for the position. Makes you wonder, how much are they getting paid for? What are the qualifications for me to be a politician?

Let me answer the first question by giving you this list I found through Google;

Position                               Monthly Salary

President                                  57,750

Vice President                  46,200 - 54,917

Senator                            40,425 - 48,052

Congressman                   40,425 - 48,052

Governor                          28,875 - 34,323

Mayor                               23,422 - 27,842

The mayor's  monthly salary is just the same as a call center agent salary. And an Operations Manager from a good call center earns as much as 100k per month.  Now, do you still want to run for office? Believe it or not, a number of people would still say yes to this. For them, it's not always about the money you can earn legally, it's also about the connections, favors, power, and money you can get from the people around you. Now who wouldn't want that right? I can open a Meth lab in Marikina and nobody can question that since I'm the Mayor or maybe a Senator. I can get favors from the local gambling or drug lords and receive thousands of money on a regular basis without that much effort, I just have to tell the police to leave those guys alone and I'll be secured for the rest of my term, or maybe even after my term, since I already acquired the connection I need! Huh, So much for being born in a democratic and catholic country where stealing is punishable by God and by law, when people who steal are from the church and from the government.

Now, question number 2: Qualifications.

As per Section 3, Article VI of the 1987 Philippine Constitution: A senatorial candidate should qualify by being:

• Natural-born citizen
• At least 35 years old on the day of the election
• Able to read and write
• A registered voter
• A resident of the Philippines for not less than 2 years immediately preceding the day of the election

Now I don't know 'bout you, but for me, I believe this 'list' lacks a lot of factors. For example: 

• Being mentally stable and with an IQ of at least 88 which is a bit higher than the average Filipino.
• Morally straight and is a good role model.
• Has respect for himself.
• Etc. I know you guys can add up to this list.

Being a politician means you're a leader and a role model. You will represent our country to other countries so automatically, you should know how to speak well using our native tongue, and the business language which is English. Politicians are also called public servants, so you should put the people of whom you serve first, so you should know how to prioritize. You will be responsible for handling your people's money, so you should know how to budget properly, handle money wisely and know how to differentiate your money from the people's money. So we as the voters should be very vigilant with whom we put in power.

Especially now since the supposed requirement of being "able" to serve our country has been changed from the list above to just being popular and charismatic, and sometimes pretty or handsome and rich. Or most popular these days; being a member of a family of politicians or what we now call 'traditional politicians'.

What the hell, right?

I mean, can't we have someone like Boy Abunda? Or maybe Winnie Monsod? Heck, I can even accept Bob Ong as a candidate. Though he doesn't have the experience required, or the background and family name to support candidacy, he at least has a firm grasp of how the Filipino world works! And he can speak and write understandable English and I can say he will be able to rub elbows with politicians here and abroad. But that's just my opinion of course.

My point is, can't we do better? Haven't we learned from our history of failed governance from previous leaders?  Are we so deep in the dirt that we can't even afford to pay attention to detail?

You are who you vote. So does this mean most of the voters now are stupid, uneducated, robbers, rapists, and only rely upon their parents for their own good?

Then we're doomed.

-Leonard

Elevator Ghosts

If you ask any random person where to find ghosts, they will undoubtedly say hospitals.

Hospitals are often frequented by ghosts due to the aura that surrounds them such as death, pain, loneliness and despair. often times, these negative energies seep into the structure itself and thus manifestations happen.

I've encountered a lot of these so called hospital ghosts. I lived in one of the biggest hospitals in Manila because my father was confined with cancer and for five months, I've seen and experienced a lot of them but the stories I love are not from me but from the nurses who did their rounds and experienced these hauntings first hand.

One particular nurse told me a story of how she met a scary apparition that almost made her quit her job. She was assigned in the Operating room of the Hospital located at the ground floor. The nurse was asked to get supplies for the next operation located at basement four of the hospital. All the other nurses are afraid to go down to the basement because it is near the morgue but being the non believer of the group, she just shrugged and went to the basement.

Everything went normal from the elevator trip down to the supply room. When she picked up all the supplies she needed, she went straight to the elevator and pressed the up button when the elevator opened. A man in his late twenties wearing a hospital gown is already inside and made way for her to enter. She was already inside the elevator when a young boy came rushing and yelled stop but she immediately pressed close.

The guy with him asked her why she didn't let the boy get in, she told her that she is not a believer of the paranormal but the boy is already dead. The boy died during the operation that very morning and that the boy is also wearing a red tag on his left arm, A tag for dead bodies in the morgue when the guy beside him  pulled up his sleeve and told her,

"oh, you mean like this one?"

She woke up two days later.

-Sheldon

The Greatest Pain

What is the greatest pain of all? My friends and I had our own share of stories of what I mean and lately, we realized we have something in common and it all boils down to one root cause.

I’ve been into trouble because of something that I think I did not do. It is because of misinterpretation of "Lying". You tell me, if something isn’t told, will it be considered lying? Isn't it that when we tell a fabricated story, then that's the time that it is a lie? In your argument, we have had this talk before, that you expect me to tell you everything. I admit that I did not comply and the expectations are not met, but it was not a lie. I understand the hurt and pain that you are in. I have been there and even experienced worst. You hoped for the best in me but I was complacent and hard headed. You gave me a chance and I blew it.

Betrayal can be forgiven but it will definitely leave a mark that will mold us to who we are now or tomorrow. It is still a choice of what will be our resolution. If we choose to hope, trust or love again but it will never be the same. Some choose to close themselves to prevent themselves from being in the same position that they were when they were betrayed. Some move on and keeps on living, ready and willing to get hurt again as long as it is in the arms of their loved one or never stops until they find the right one. Some needs time and time can heal pain. Some needs assurance, but how? Words are always not enough for me but this is the only thing that we can hold on to if we are out of time.

 "Lie is a good story ruined by the truth." - Barney Stinson

"To lie is to deliver a false statement to another person which the speaking person knows is not the whole truth, intentionally." - Wikipedia

Feel free to choose your definition.

-Howard

Sa Kinauukulan

Sa totoo lang, napakadaling i-handle ng mga lalake sa isang relasyon. You dont need to be the most beautiful girl, the most charming or even the most talked about lady in town. Mayroon ka lang dapat gawin para maging maayos ang inyong pagsasama.

Don’t box us out. Minsan hindi maiiwasan na ikompara kami sa mga ex niyo. Call it force of habit, pero minsan hinahanap hanap niyo yung dati niyong ginagawa. Kung madalas kayo ng ex mo magtalo pero yung bago mo tahimik lang kaya naiirita ka. O kung ganito si ex dati, ganito ka naman etc, understandable yun, pero unacceptable. Kaya Wag na wag ipagmalaki si ex kay current, kasi kung mas ok siya, di sana kayo pa hindi ba? Or make your man do this and that because that’s what you want. Oo nga, reyna namin kayo, at kung pwede lang lahat ng gusto nyo gagawin namin pero tao kami. We’ve been living as we are for a long time nung wala ka pa. Some things can be changed, some cannot. Gaya nang kung vocal si bf saying things that you deemed paulit ulit or nakakasawa, you can remind him, but not to the point na maramdaman niyang mas makakabuti na hindi na lang kumibo kasi baka masabihan ng paulit-ulit at nakakasawa.

Be malambing/nalalambing. Girls, lalake kami. We’re born to show how we love someone. Kung innate skill naming ang maglambing, yun din ang deal killer samin. Kahit gano pa ka buwisit ang isang sitwasyon, ka badtrip, isang lambing mo lang, pustahan tayo, ngingiti kami. Nakakawala ng kahit na anong negative emotion ang isang babaeng nagpapalambing na, malambing pa. Pinoy tayo, dapat master natin yan. Meron kasing mga babaeng nawawala na yung sweet factor kasi Bf na niya si Bf niya. O kaya, kasi graduate na daw. May obligasyon tayo sa mga partner natin. At isa dyan ang pagiging malambing. Besides, this is how you’ll get your new shoes or bags hehehe, Konting lambing lang yan, odibadibs?

Honesty. Don’t commit kung wala kang balak maging matino. You want to play? Then be single. Don’t commit. Aminado ako na maraming lalakeng tarantado, pero maraming paring matino, if you know what to do. You don’t need to hurt us by being a flirt whenever we’re not around. Or wasting your time trying to look for a perfect love, and staying with us kasi wala pa si Mr Better. To find a perfect love, if there’s such a thing, is to be perfect. You can’t have it, if you’re not. Wanna find a good guy? Be a good girl. Stick with us kasi you want or need to. If you can’t, don’t commit. Yun lang yun. Believe me girl, kung beterana ka, may palaging mas beterano sayo. True and lasting relationship is a result of two working individuals who commit to each other.

Appreciate us, see our worth and recognize our importance. Binilhan ka ng cake ni Bf. Hindi ka na nga nag thank you muna, napansin mo pa agad yung sablay na bakit maliit yung binili? O kaya pinagluto ka ng breakfast, pinagluto ka, at ang una mong nakita, e yung ulam na kulang sa bawang. What the fuck? Really? Effort na lahat lahat, yung sablay parin ang unang nakita? 9 of 10 efforts at sa pang labing isa pa naming nakuha ang matamis mong “thank you?” believe me, lahat ng lalake gagawa ng paraan para sa minamahal, pero madaling mabulag yan ng iba kapag ganito ka. Susmeyo. Matuto kang maging grateful bago maging hateful. Also, lalake kami, nasa DNA naming yung feeling na needed kami. At isa rin yun sa hinahanap namin sa isang babae. Yung kita at ramdam yung halaga namin. Yung tipong, kahit kalaban ko na ang mundo, kakampi pa rin kita, manalo matalo. Parang Ginebra, do or die, we fight together. Yung simpleng porma lang kami, pero ngiting wagas ka kasi you find us cute o bago sa paningin. Yung nakikita niyo at pinaparamdam niyo na thankful kayo kasi kahit papano, merong kami sa buhay niyo. It’s one of the nicest feeling na pwedeng maramdaman ng lalake. Hindi ito yung tipong gagawin niyo kaming driver or meal ticket. Kahit yung simpleng pag abot lang kasi hindi niyo abot, “buti nalang matangkad ka…” “buti alam mo yung lugar na pupuntahan natin?...” “Nax, pormado ah, san binyag?...” “buti na lang andito ka…” madami pang simpleng bagay para maka appreciate. Makaalala lang kayo, appreciate and treat us the way we do, and malapit lapit ka na sa katotohanan niyan.

Lastly, Love us. Minsan, kahit ikaw na ang pinaka buraot na babae sa balat ng lupa, bukod sa mahal ka ng lalake, dapat mahal mo rin siya. Sapat na yun para burahin naming mga lalake lahat ng imperfection meron kayong mga babae. Pakita at paramdam mo sa amin na kami lang. Love us, just us. At sayong sayong lang ang lalake mo.

-Raj

The Genius Life

I've always been fascinated by how the human mind works, how it can come up with a good decision although it's the first time they've encountered the issue or how they can choose between two similar options and still be proud or shocked about their own choices.

Scribbling nonsense, obsessive compulsiveness, being eccentric, weird habits, daydreaming, drug abuse. These are just some of the habits a person with mental retardation will show. But, it is also the habits of geniuses like Albert Einstein, Nikola Tesla, Socrates and Sheldon Cooper.

But what does it take to be like them? And if given the opportunity, would you like to be one of them?

Let's look at it this way, they have given much contribution to science and the world in general. They have explained how things work and a better understanding of our surroundings. They are popular, smart, and most probably rich. But of course it's not all fun and games and pretty things. Most of these geniuses experienced trauma in their lives that MAY have led to the discovery of the things they have discovered. Or, they are considered what we now call "borderline autism". Or just plain weird. And because of these traits and odd personalities, they are uneasy w/ their current surroundings, so they end up thinking of ways to better their lives.

But is it worth it? I mean, yes they have done considerable achievement in their respective fields and a big contribution to humanity. But if you think about it, they've led a harsh life. Being bullied in school just because you're different. Being called a nerd. Being ignored by the 'crush ng bayan'. Being the subject of criticism and gossip just because you're the teachers pet. Not being able to enjoy your childhood just because you're an outcast, a geek, a nerd, a loser.

So here's something to think about, would you like to live a normal life and enjoy your childhood and die as a somebody? Or live like a nerd, mature at a very young age and die as a legend?

-Leonard 

Social Networking Vanity

People post a lot on social networking sites like facebook and twitter. Nowadays, they will check in on their location, tag a friend who they are with, what they are doing and even what they’re going to eat.

But do we really need to believe everything that a friend posts?

For example, a former agent of mine just posted recently that he went out on an intimate date with a hot girl. Now, it’s not that I don’t trust the guy but my argument is about his post. Why do you have to post something like that? Can’t you just tell the story to your friends and talk about it like normal people do? Do you want to be a topic in the next beer episode where you will be the guy who gets to go out with the hot girl? Or do you want to tell everybody that you can do it too?

I call this the trophy effect. It’s one way of saying “hey, I did it” or “I’m one of the guys now”.

But riddle me this. Shouldn’t we be more afraid of that certain someone who doesn’t post on facebook? On someone who doesn’t have much online activities? 

Those types of people have nothing to prove themselves because they know they can do it and not count the deeds but rather laugh at the people who do.  

Remember, the greater the silence, the greater the mystery.

Just Sayin’

-Sheldon

On Falling Down and Rising Up

I’ve been a jerk these past few days. I did something stupid, so stupid that it made me feel like a jerk or should I say a dumbass. I was never like this, that I create scenarios or formulate ideas that seem too far from happening. I was never the type of guy that always gives meaning to something that I saw and hear.

“…you failed me, again.”

I can’t remember the last time I was affected by mere words from someone. Come on, I’ve worked in Call Centers and I am used to the idea of “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me” but those four words really hit the target. It was like everything that I’ve done went straight to the bins. I couldn’t even utter a single word. My world went down with my tears. It hurts not because someone special said those to me but the fact that I was the one who made her say it.

I hate losing. I hate failing. I hate being second-rate. I hate it. I hate the truth that I made a mistake that eventually backfired. Call it karma. I call it plain stupidity.

That’s why when the message registered into my phone, I was stunned and just looked at it for more than a minute. “…You failed me”, “…already killed me” and “…again” made it worse.

I realized I should never be like this. I was never like this. I was never the jerk. I was the boss of my own life. I have my own diskartes, moves, my pick-ups, my swag, my confidence. I never cared about what happened yesterday, what matters to me is today.

 I wish I could re-do it. I wish I could erase it. But the damage has been done. I made a mistake, I earned my price.

But I just wish she would understand. I hope she will eventually understand.

I will not defend myself. What I did was wrong. But I have my reasons. And I stand with what I thought was right at that time. But now I knew better.

I fall down, I will rise up. No other way for me but up.

I learned not to let our mind deceive or bring us down. Sometimes it works against us just to see who the boss is. Got to let the brain know who’s in-charge.

Things only matter in the mind. If you never mind, things would never matter.

I must stop thinking and will start doing.

-Raj

Generation Gap

Liempo - A good mixture of meat and fats

Kamatis - For acidity

Labanos - Texture and a bit of sweetness

Sitaw - Texture and to even out the flavor a bit (For long life?)

Kang-kong - For texture and crispiness

Siling panigang - Just a hint of spiciness

Gabe - For the full thick soup goodness

And of course..

Sampaloc - To give it the full sinigang experience

Now that's a home cooked meal!

I don't know about you, but I can say that I (27 yrs of age) grew up in a generation where music was good and was made using wooden or brass instruments, playing outside means rough-housing, playing hide-and-seek and not in front of a computer, and courtship means you visit her and her family to impress them personally and not through Facebook or Skype, and a home cooked meal means it was cooked by your Mom from scratch. And it was great! Almost everything was made with love, passion and attention. Custom made. To a persons liking. We didn't use the term "Pwede na yan!", instead, you will often hear "Kulang pa yan!".  It was a time where quality matters and not just the number of things you can do in one sitting.

The generation today won't get this, since we now live in a time where everything is "instant". May it be  noodles, coffee, photo, letters/mail, music, movies, girlfriend/s and food, etc. Everyone is rushing, everyone seems to be in a hurry to finish what they needed or wanted to do. Just so they can waste their time sitting in front of their computers or TV sets and get hypnotized by the swirling colors of the boob tube. Where is the love in that? What's happening?

Now I am a father of two (yet again, legally speaking) and I don't want them to miss out on the wonderful things in life. So I promised  myself to teach them the old way, and can I just say, better way of doing things. Slower? Yes. But way worth the wait and effort.

Let me express how I feel in tagalog.

Nakaka-miss yung panahon na na-eexcite ka dahil alam mo na ang ulam ninyo ay sinigang, at nandun ka sa hapag-kainan, pina-panood ang nanay mo habang pinapakuluan nya ang karne ng baboy, at sa unang kulo ay pipigaan nya ng kamatis para pandagdag sa lasa at bango at ipa-pagpatuloy ang pagpa-pakulo hanggang sa lumambot ang karne, at habang hinihintay ninyo yun ay tuturuan ka ng tamang pag-hiwa ng mga sangkap na gulay habang ipinapaliwanag sayo ang silbi ng bawat isang rekado. At sa paglambot ng karne ay ipa-paliwanag din sa iyo ang tamang bilang o pagkakasunod-sunod ng pag-lagay ng mga rekado para mapanatili ang lasa at itsura ng sinigang. Hanggang dumating na sa pagtimpla ng lasa, ang pag-katas o paglalagay ng sampaloc. Mahirap, mabusisi, kailangan ng tyaga.

At sa pag-hain ng nanay mo ng bagong saing na kanin at mainit na ulam, at sa pag-higop ng medyo malapot na sabaw ng sinigang na luto niya , walang nag-uusap, walang reaksyon maliban sa mga simpleng ngiti sa aming mga labi, dahil alam naming lahat na wala pa rin tatalo sa lutong bahay. Sa luto na di ginamitan ng "instant" kundi pagmamahal.

Korni, oo, pero alam mo na totoo ang sinasabi ko.

Chocolate can make you smile, but nothing can soothe you better than your Moms' home cooked meal.

-Leonard