Loyal but Unfaithful: Bakit nagloloko ang mga lalaki?

Why do birds suddenly appear? Every time, you are near?
Where’s the “good” in goodbyes?
Why Samson loves Delilah?
Where is the love?
Is there life after death?
Are you and me gonna be together?
Does Jennifer Love Hewitt?
What is Victoria’s secret?
Bakit baliktad magbasa ng libro ang mga Pilipino?

Ilan lang ang mga ito sa mga tanong ng karamihan. Pero isa na yata sa pinaka controversial na katanungan na na-engkwentro ko ay kung bakit “nagloloko” ang mga lalake?

Ayon kay Bb. Webster Dictionary ang “Cheating” daw is  being sexually unfaithful (intransitive verb) or violating rules dishonestly and practicing fraud or trickery. Cheater ka daw kapag you are a dishonest person who uses clever means to cheat others out of something of value. Marami pa siyang definition, siguro, siya ang unang biktima ng panloloko.

Bakit nga ba nagloloko ang mga lalake? – pero teka, nanloloko nga ba kami? Mahirap i-defend ang something na hindi naman namin ginagawa.

One man asked me, “why do you call it cheating ba? kasi meron kang girlfriend tapos naghanap ka ng iba? kasi may responsibility ka na pero gusto mo pa ng dagdag? or kasi nag eenjoy ka na, gusto mo pa ng isa?”

So there. Title palang debate na. According to Men’s Universal Law – (after ng 10 utos ng diyos) magkapitpitan na ng itlog, wag na wag kang ….

Rule 11: papahuli;
Rule 12: aamin;

Extended version:
Rule 13: Ituro ang katabi/Isisi sa iba;

Mahirap nga naman mag tanong ng basta basta nalang, kasi para akong namimintang; hindi rin naman sila sasagot talaga, kasi yun ay tanda na ng pag-amin. So walang lalakeng nagloloko – unless ready na siyang umamin. Which, according to the law stated above – e hindi dapat gawin kahit kelan.

“I cant say what we've done is cheating” stated one fella of mine. “you can only call it cheating pag may pinirmahan ka na at sinelyuhan ng singsing; Pero kung GF palang yan, you’re not cheating, you’re just enjoying your options, or if not enjoying, choosing your options;

“Kasi kaya…” said one person I knew. Dahil marami daw incompetent na lalake. Sa halos lahat ng aspeto siguro. Kaya bakit daw sisihin yung mga “may kakayahan?” We are covering for our fellow men. I have the talent, let me cover up for you. “Parang calls lang yan (call center setting,) hindi pwedeng drop ka lang ng drop ng calls; at dahil nag drop na yung iba, malamang ikaw sasalo nung iba…” Sumpa pa nga daw ang pagiging “talentado.”

Pumasok din ang theory ng  inverse proportion of our population. Kasi nga daw, mas maraming babae kesa sa lalake. The more you have, the more you need… (bahala ka na mag dugtong.) Less talk, less mistake. More talk, more mistake. More girls, more mistake. Margin of error is huge. Parang raffle, the more entries you have, the more chances of winning. Maraming babae, means maraming options- meaning maraming tukso.

For me, there is no such thing as 90% - 10% theory. Eto yung, ang mga mahal natin daw ay nag tataglay lang ng 90% ng mga katangian na gusto natin sa isang tao. The rest, wala daw talaga sa kanya. Therefore, men daw tends to seek the other 10% sa iba. Love is immeasurable; walang 90% lang kitang mahal etc etc. Mahal kung mahal. Hindi kung hindi.

Parang si Voldemort lang yan (Harry Potter’s BFF,) hindi talaga makukuntento sa isa. Mas marami, mas masaya. Ang tawag dito “Horcrux” theory. You put a bit of your soul sa isa (at sa ibat ibang) entity,

Isa sa pinaka worst reason is, a guy just had the wrong woman from the get go. Na realize lang nung hindi na pwedeng makakawala. We call it Pinilit mode;

Inborn na sa mga lalake ang magmahal. Ang primary function daw kasi ng mga lalake ay to spread our lahi. You can’t blame a guy daw who’s fulfilling his duty for mankind.

How we perceived things/ideas are based on our society; society tells us that you have to be good looking because that’s what’s acceptable etc - that you need to have this, and that to be in.  Unless you are committed, you’re not cheating; commitment is defined by our society as being married; unmarried are free agents; but kung married naman ang guy, babalik lang tayo sa mga topic sa itaas to justify what he is doing. (hehe)

What women don’t know about us, men, is that - we can love multiple things/people at the same time –at the same level. Innate talent. Capable kami. And we’re not sorry for that.

Ang pako, pwedeng bumutas kahit saan; pero ang butas, hindi pwedeng pumako kahit kelan.

Pag narinig niyo sa mga partner niyo tong mga to, you know what to do.

My girl nailed it the best – “kaya ka nga nasa commitment eh!” with matching padyak ng paa at mataas na boses.

My prayer goes to all who’ve been cheated on.

WALANG NAGLOLOKONG LALAKE, KASI WALANG UMAAMIN… unless nahuli.

-Raj

Of Video Scandals and Sex Videos

Feast your eyes on the newest scandal that was made public! No, I'm not talking about Chito Miranda and Neri Naig. I'm talking about those who dwell on the issue thinking that they knew better off the two of them and that this issue will be added to a long list of leaked sex videos.

I'd be honest with you, I've seen their video. And for me, there is nothing wrong with it. I pity those who give snide comments about the issue like they should not have done the video in the first place. So what if they did? They are two consenting adults that video taped their romp which allegedly got stolen and was uploaded on the internet. If I ever made a sex video and if they were uploaded on social sites, I have nothing to be ashamed for or feel sorry about. I am an adult, I did that with my partner's blessing and for those who did saw the video, enjoy.

Suddenly I admire this beautiful young woman who also became involved with a leaked video but decided to keep mum about it. She recently got married and is now a happy housewife to her singer husband. Silence truly is golden.

If I were Chito, I would not cry foul. I'd rather say "ayos ba?" Come on, I am Chito Miranda. Shame on those TV personalities who enjoy talking about the issue and give out hypocritical comments, "ang pa-plastic nyo."

And to you Chito, here's my personal message to you:

"More!"

-Sheldon

Crab Mentality

Sa magkakapatid, hindi mo maiiwasan ang inggitan. Dahil na rin siguro sa pagpapalaki ng magulang na hindi mo din masisisi kung merong kakampihan sa magkakapatid, hindi naman kasi sila magkaka pareho ng asal at ugali. Kahit na rin siguro sa magkakabarkada o magkaka-opisina ay mayroong inggitan, pero ang hindi ko matanggap tanggap ay iyong sisiraan ka pa para lang makuha ang gusto nila.

Ang tinatawag na pagiging utak talangka ng mga Pilipino ang pinaka ayoko sa lahat ng mga masasamang ugali natin kasunod ng tinatawag na filipino time at mañana habit. ‘Yun bang bakit kailangan mong dumating sa punto na kailangan mong ilaglag yung mga taong wala namang kinalaman sa kasalukuyang estado mo para makuha mo ang gusto mo o kaya para madungisan mo man lang sila para makaganti dahil hindi naging patas ang antas ng mga trabaho ninyo?

Ano ba ang kailangan nating patunayan dito? Na mas madami tayong ginagawa kumpara sa iba? Na dapat ay mas malaki ang nakukuha nating benepisyo kaysa sa mga inaakala mong walang ginagawa?

Sino ba ang nagsabi sa iyo na tanggapin mo kung magkano ang nakukuha mo ngayon? Sila ba?

Sino ba ang nagsabi sa iyo na pumayag ka sa kontrata mo? Sila ba?

Kung magiging ganyan ang usapan e mas malaki pala ang karapatan kong magreklamo, pero bakit ko naman gagawin iyon? Bakit ko kailangang isisi sa iba ang mga kinahinatnan ng mga desisyon na pinasok ko?

‘Yan ang hirap sa atin e, nauuna ang pagtingin natin sa ginagawa ng iba bago ang mga sarili natin. Nauuna lagi ang pagsilip sa kabilang plato at huhusgahan kagad ang kapitbahay dahil ang ulam nila ay manok.

Kaya tayo hindi umaasenso e.

Bangon Pilipino! Dahil kapag hindi ka nagbago, mauubos ang mga taong marunong magsikap sa sarili at hindi kailangang manghila ng paa ng iba. Mauubos sila dahil lahat sila ay titira na sa ibang bansa at walang matitira sa iyo kung hindi ang mga taong walang ginawa kundi mainggit sa sitwasyon ng iba.

Bitter.

-Sheldon

Friend

Fred has and always been my closest friend especially on those times that I was alone. You see, living a life without anyone to talk or converse to for almost a month is unnerving. I’m loud. I’m a conversationalist. I’m a clown. It would be a culture shock for me not to be engaged in any small talks. May it be just goof around talk or a closed-door meeting; I have to be the one speaking. I have to communicate. I must.

So being away from my family and my lady for a month was really sad. I wake up each day with no one to greet a good morning or good evening to. I eat alone and have no one to talk about what happened yesterday and no one to discuss with about my plans for tomorrow. I was almost on the verge of going somewhere; maybe meet a stranger or two, just to know I’m not alone.

But I wasn’t alone all along.

During the times I felt alone, Fred’s there looking at me and asking me to pick him up and play him. I was alive again. I was able to fight off boredom and sadness with him by my side. I even started filming myself with him. The feeling was surreal. I’m so glad I have him. The confidence in me got back whenever he is with me. I wish he will last ‘til I’m old enough and can still carry a guitar.

Yes a folk, Fred’s a guitar.

Meet “Fred,” my new found friend. I called it as such because it was given as a gift by my good friend, Alfred Sajot III – thus the name. I also find the name cute, so the name stuck.

At least once in our lives, we will feel alone in this world. That even though we see a lot of people, it will still feel like you’re on your own. One needs a friend to be relevant again. Fred made the musician-wannabe in me, alive again.

Fred, I love you ‘tol, together with James the Bike, my good old friends.

Here’s the song we made together called “Sayo.”

-Raj

The Struggle for Power

Being a politician is a full-time job. There's no 'clock-out',no 'overtime pay' and definitely no 'rest days' And yet, you can see a lot of them are fighting for the position. Makes you wonder, how much are they getting paid for? What are the qualifications for me to be a politician?

Let me answer the first question by giving you this list I found through Google;

Position                               Monthly Salary

President                                  57,750

Vice President                  46,200 - 54,917

Senator                            40,425 - 48,052

Congressman                   40,425 - 48,052

Governor                          28,875 - 34,323

Mayor                               23,422 - 27,842

The mayor's  monthly salary is just the same as a call center agent salary. And an Operations Manager from a good call center earns as much as 100k per month.  Now, do you still want to run for office? Believe it or not, a number of people would still say yes to this. For them, it's not always about the money you can earn legally, it's also about the connections, favors, power, and money you can get from the people around you. Now who wouldn't want that right? I can open a Meth lab in Marikina and nobody can question that since I'm the Mayor or maybe a Senator. I can get favors from the local gambling or drug lords and receive thousands of money on a regular basis without that much effort, I just have to tell the police to leave those guys alone and I'll be secured for the rest of my term, or maybe even after my term, since I already acquired the connection I need! Huh, So much for being born in a democratic and catholic country where stealing is punishable by God and by law, when people who steal are from the church and from the government.

Now, question number 2: Qualifications.

As per Section 3, Article VI of the 1987 Philippine Constitution: A senatorial candidate should qualify by being:

• Natural-born citizen
• At least 35 years old on the day of the election
• Able to read and write
• A registered voter
• A resident of the Philippines for not less than 2 years immediately preceding the day of the election

Now I don't know 'bout you, but for me, I believe this 'list' lacks a lot of factors. For example: 

• Being mentally stable and with an IQ of at least 88 which is a bit higher than the average Filipino.
• Morally straight and is a good role model.
• Has respect for himself.
• Etc. I know you guys can add up to this list.

Being a politician means you're a leader and a role model. You will represent our country to other countries so automatically, you should know how to speak well using our native tongue, and the business language which is English. Politicians are also called public servants, so you should put the people of whom you serve first, so you should know how to prioritize. You will be responsible for handling your people's money, so you should know how to budget properly, handle money wisely and know how to differentiate your money from the people's money. So we as the voters should be very vigilant with whom we put in power.

Especially now since the supposed requirement of being "able" to serve our country has been changed from the list above to just being popular and charismatic, and sometimes pretty or handsome and rich. Or most popular these days; being a member of a family of politicians or what we now call 'traditional politicians'.

What the hell, right?

I mean, can't we have someone like Boy Abunda? Or maybe Winnie Monsod? Heck, I can even accept Bob Ong as a candidate. Though he doesn't have the experience required, or the background and family name to support candidacy, he at least has a firm grasp of how the Filipino world works! And he can speak and write understandable English and I can say he will be able to rub elbows with politicians here and abroad. But that's just my opinion of course.

My point is, can't we do better? Haven't we learned from our history of failed governance from previous leaders?  Are we so deep in the dirt that we can't even afford to pay attention to detail?

You are who you vote. So does this mean most of the voters now are stupid, uneducated, robbers, rapists, and only rely upon their parents for their own good?

Then we're doomed.

-Leonard

Elevator Ghosts

If you ask any random person where to find ghosts, they will undoubtedly say hospitals.

Hospitals are often frequented by ghosts due to the aura that surrounds them such as death, pain, loneliness and despair. often times, these negative energies seep into the structure itself and thus manifestations happen.

I've encountered a lot of these so called hospital ghosts. I lived in one of the biggest hospitals in Manila because my father was confined with cancer and for five months, I've seen and experienced a lot of them but the stories I love are not from me but from the nurses who did their rounds and experienced these hauntings first hand.

One particular nurse told me a story of how she met a scary apparition that almost made her quit her job. She was assigned in the Operating room of the Hospital located at the ground floor. The nurse was asked to get supplies for the next operation located at basement four of the hospital. All the other nurses are afraid to go down to the basement because it is near the morgue but being the non believer of the group, she just shrugged and went to the basement.

Everything went normal from the elevator trip down to the supply room. When she picked up all the supplies she needed, she went straight to the elevator and pressed the up button when the elevator opened. A man in his late twenties wearing a hospital gown is already inside and made way for her to enter. She was already inside the elevator when a young boy came rushing and yelled stop but she immediately pressed close.

The guy with him asked her why she didn't let the boy get in, she told her that she is not a believer of the paranormal but the boy is already dead. The boy died during the operation that very morning and that the boy is also wearing a red tag on his left arm, A tag for dead bodies in the morgue when the guy beside him  pulled up his sleeve and told her,

"oh, you mean like this one?"

She woke up two days later.

-Sheldon

The Greatest Pain

What is the greatest pain of all? My friends and I had our own share of stories of what I mean and lately, we realized we have something in common and it all boils down to one root cause.

I’ve been into trouble because of something that I think I did not do. It is because of misinterpretation of "Lying". You tell me, if something isn’t told, will it be considered lying? Isn't it that when we tell a fabricated story, then that's the time that it is a lie? In your argument, we have had this talk before, that you expect me to tell you everything. I admit that I did not comply and the expectations are not met, but it was not a lie. I understand the hurt and pain that you are in. I have been there and even experienced worst. You hoped for the best in me but I was complacent and hard headed. You gave me a chance and I blew it.

Betrayal can be forgiven but it will definitely leave a mark that will mold us to who we are now or tomorrow. It is still a choice of what will be our resolution. If we choose to hope, trust or love again but it will never be the same. Some choose to close themselves to prevent themselves from being in the same position that they were when they were betrayed. Some move on and keeps on living, ready and willing to get hurt again as long as it is in the arms of their loved one or never stops until they find the right one. Some needs time and time can heal pain. Some needs assurance, but how? Words are always not enough for me but this is the only thing that we can hold on to if we are out of time.

 "Lie is a good story ruined by the truth." - Barney Stinson

"To lie is to deliver a false statement to another person which the speaking person knows is not the whole truth, intentionally." - Wikipedia

Feel free to choose your definition.

-Howard